Having three children on the autism spectrum, we have had our fair share of having to learn how to explain autism to autistic children. When our youngest daughter was diagnosed at age eight, we realized that we needed to explain things a little differently to her than we would to our three-year-old or even to a sibling of an autistic child.
After a diagnosis, as parents and caregivers, you go through the motions of telling family, friends, and other caregivers about your child’s diagnosis. Typically, you are doing this while still grasping at straws to learn about autism yourself. In this process, it’s easy to understand you may forget to explain autism to your child with the autism diagnosis.
Explain Autism to Autistic Children
While discovering more about autism, you will come across the neurodiversity movement. Many autistic adults do not like the puzzle piece (for several different reasons). O e way to help support your child and other autistic individuals is by purchasing items designed for neurodiversity like these autism shirts.
So today, we will go over just a few basics on understanding and how to explain autism to autistic children. With the resources below, you will be prepared to handle the discussion positively!
1. What is Autism?
The first thing is to explain autism. Acco ing to your child’s age and maturity level, this may be slightly different but still the basis of what you need to explain. Simply put, “Autism means that your brain works differently from other children‘s brains. “
You will also need to know more about autism yourself to answer any child‘s questions. Here are eight key things to know about autism. You can also read more about autism signs and symptoms here.
Remember to keep your answers simple and to the point. Many people with autism do not understand sarcasm and may not understand metaphors until a much older age.
2. Keep it Positive
Remember to keep it positive whenever you talk to your child (around or even near) about autism. Be open and honest about autism. Teaching different, not less, is ideal when explaining autism to a child with autism. You are your child’s most prominent advocate. How you s Autism is how they will see autism.
3. Use Resources
Thankfully, there are many fantastic resources to help you explain autism to an autistic child! Here are a few of my favorite books to help children of all different ages understand autism.
How to Explain Autism to Autistic Children
Thanks for reading “Explaining Autism to an Autistic Child.” Let us know how your conversation went! What was the most successful part of your talk? What was the most challenging part?
Thank you for sharing your story! I love reading about others experiences. It helps me to decide the best way to handle things with my own child. My daughter is 6. Not only is she autistic, but she is also legally blind. She’s incredibly intelligent but has a very hard time expressing herself. She lacks the confidence to trust herself, though we know her memory is amazing and she’s unbelievably smart. She’s in ABA now and thriving, though we still have a long way to go.
After her diagnosis, I decided it would be best for her to hear from me what it means right away, rather than having her notice she’s different from her classmates and wonder why.
I explained to her that autistic just means that her brain works a little differently than mommy’s. I had to keep it age appropriate and not too complicated. I explained that her remarkable memory and attention to details are a part of that, and though she may be different from others, she’s wonderful and perfect just the way she is. I told her to be proud of herself because she’s a great person and that mommy will always love her no matter what. When she’s cranky, when she’s happy, when she’s melting down and when she’s silly I love her the same.
She smiled so big and she’s proud of who she is, so I’ll count that as a win! ?
I am glad you enjoyed reading our story! I love how you explained to your daughter, it was perfectly age appropriate. There is nothing that beats our children being happy and smiling!
My son is 4 and was recently diagnosed. We have told him a little about having autism, and his assumption is that everyone should have autism. A few weeks after telling him about it, he was having a hard time in a store and a lady made a rude comment. After the incident he asked me why I didn’t give her some autism so she would understand. Our older son (age 6) is having a much harder time with his little brother’s diagnoses. Since explaining it to my 6 year old he has made comments like, “why can’t he just be normal,” and, “why does he have to have autism, I just want a regular brother.”
Do we know of any good resources for explaining autism to kids without autism?? My son will be going to regular kindergarten next year and I would love to gift a cool book about autism (or 10) to his new teacher that she could share with the kids in his class to help them understand why he doesn’t always see things the same ways they do… 🙂
Hi Sarah! When it comes to younger ages, sesame street’s autism initiative is truly amazing! I highly recommend (affiliate link) “We’re Amazing 1,2,3! A Story About Friendship and Autism” as well as all the resources at http://autism.sesamestreet.org/. It is perfectly age appropriate and does an amazing job of celebrating differences.
As an Autistic adult, what was presented here might have helped me and my parents in understanding Autism. I was officially diagnosed as a kid, but nobody told me! My parents and doctors were afraid I would use it as an excuse to do things I wasn’t supposed to do and/or try to get out of doing what I was supposed to do. I only learned almost 3 years ago about my diagnosis- and I’m almost 60!
Hello, when it comes to being a mother of not just 1 child with autism, but 2, things can be hard to explain…. My 2nd son had given off many “red flags” for being autistic from birth to ag 1 yrs old.
#1 I noticed (at a very early age) that when he cried he had no tears
#2 he had a huge fear of water bathing, showers, etc.
#3 he had like no since of pain, what any other child would feel as severe pain, absolutely did not bother him!! This list could go on and on, but way to much to list. It literal took me until he was almost 3 yrs old to get his pediatrician to realize that something was not right with my child. We finally got referred to The Sparks Clinic in Birmingham, Al, where they out ruled autism, because he didn’t show many signs for being on the spectrum!!!! With my mind being blown, I then have to record his daily behaviors, well their final diagnosis was C.l.b.d, Constructive Learning Behavioral Disorder. Which is basically a characteristic of ASD.
Hi! Adult with autism and ADHD here. Note autism is genetic. So you can always relate to your child because you or your partner passed it down. Being autistic is being different and no one understands and no one wants to. Everyone just wants you to be “normal” and you piss off a lot of people because you are not “normal”. People with autism come across as high maintenance or difficult. Your child will have bullies and kids will make fun of them. Mostly because social things will just pass right over their head. Keep it positive but keep it real. Look up famous people and their childhood (Tim Burton). Please PLEASE have the hard conversation of what people can and can’t touch on your child’s body. Children with disabilities are more likely to be molested because of this lack of social understanding. We are seen as an easy target. Once raped you already fit the victim mold and your changes increase 4 times for it to happen again. KNOW WHO YOU ARE LEAVING YOUR KIDS WITH!! I was raped by a peer and an adult all before the age of 9. Be patient with your child- they are not purposely being an ass we just don’t see the world like everyone else. We need like 5 times the explanation than a neurotypical not because we are stupid (or being an ass) but because we don’t know how to proceed unless we have all the information. Do not yell at your child-you might as well talk a foreign language with tornado sirens blaring. There are things you can do to help the symptoms. You need vitamin D- go outside MOVE, stop eating foods with Roundup- pesticides are known to cause ADHD and autism, healthy fats for your brain- no seed oils, quit the sugar- sugar causes blocks in the brain and sugar in the brain at an old age causes dementia. Sodium benzoate, red 40, HFCS, avoid these like the posion they are. These changes have helped me way more than any pill or therapy. Lastly don’t let the doctors or anyone tell you what your child is capable of. There are many stories of children who learned to talk or walk or eat after doctors said they wouldn’t be able to. You got this and you aren’t alone!!!