How to Find a Surrogate and What Steps You Have to Take


Being a parent doesn’t just come from giving birth. Whether you give birth, choose adoption, or surrogacy, this is going to be the most rewarding part of your life. Surrogacy is an amazing option for those who cannot have children on their own. Keep reading to find out how to find a surrogate mother and what steps you have to take.

For those who are looking to have a baby, this can be a beautiful and tough experience. Whether you are in a same-sex partnership, without a partner, or in a relationship where you’re unable to have children naturally, surrogacy can make having a family a reality.

As you can imagine, however, finding a surrogate can be a complicated process.

From choosing the right person to negotiating a contract, this guide will go over everything you need to know about how to find a surrogate.

Navigating How to Find a Surrogate

Getting started looking for a surrogate mother can be an overwhelming process. To begin with, there are a lot of common surrogacy myths regarding the cost, the judgment from others, and whether or not you can still feel bonded with your child.

Debunking these myths and educating yourself are some of the first steps you should take.

You’ll be surprised at how open your loved ones may be and how working with the right people may be able to make surrogacy affordable.

find a surrogate mother

Set Qualifications

A surrogate mother is someone who will carry a baby for an individual or a couple. This person will carry the baby and deliver the baby on their behalf.

You’ll want to set some qualifications when you’re considering how to find a surrogate mother.

From who you want to be your surrogate, to health qualifications, their genetics, and even the distance in which you live, all can make a difference.

This person is going to have one of the most important jobs for you in the world.

Start thinking about some things that matter to you. Consider speaking with a professional on what medical and health qualifications should be set as well.

Have a Contract

As you may have figured, surrogacy can be complicated. You will likely want a legal contract setting up some parameters for both you and the surrogate before you begin the process.

A contract can help protect you both from any number of things. A contract will also help ease your mind and set some guidelines for pregnancy and delivery.

If you’re working with an agency, they can work with you on facilitating and implementing this.

If you are personally working with your surrogate directly, a lawyer can help you draw up this contract and will have templates to start from.

Work With an Agency or Someone You Trust

The most important consideration to keep in mind when you’re looking to find a surrogate mother is trust.

Whether you’re working with an agency or someone you know personally, your surrogate is carrying the most precious person in the world to you.

Trust is of the utmost importance.

Find a Surrogate That’s Right for You

Knowing how to find a surrogate can be confusing. Having qualifications, learning more about common myths, and the process involved will help ease your nerves.

Working with a medical professional will also help ensure your surrogate and your baby are in the best care possible. They can also help answer any questions and are with you every step of the way.

For more pregnancy and family guides, visit our parenting section for a ton of great resources.

Alicia Trautwein is an Autism advocate, writer, motivational speaker, and dedicated mom of four. Alicia’s desire to advocate for Autism comes from her own autism diagnosis and that of her three children, niece, and brother. Her life’s mission is to educate on autism acceptance and change the world for future generations of autistic individuals.

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