Children are one of the most special and meaningful parts of a mother’s life. Creating and nurturing life is profoundly important on many levels, especially the personal one. This is why some people find that they can begin to lose sight of themselves as anything other than simply a mom after giving birth or raising children for any length of time.
How to be a Great Mom While Staying Individual
Since caregiving is an all-encompassing job, many moms become overwhelmed by their children‘s constant needs. Eventually feel that their sense of personality and individuality has gone. There’s no need to worry, however. Take a look at how you can start to rebuild yourself as an individual without sacrificing your ability to be a fantastic mom.
Whether you made your friendships before or after giving birth to your children, you must do your best to keep in touch with the people you care about. It can feel almost impossible to find the time to call an old friend or arrange a coffee with someone when your children demand so much of your attention.
While it might feel as if using any time you have without your kids around should be spent on something tangibly productive such as work or household chores, it is equally vital that you make time to meet up with friends. Remind yourself of the connections you have outside of motherhood to strengthen your sense of individuality.
Make Time Just for You
Like the last point, carving out an hour or two just for yourself is essential for staying true to your individuality. Not only does this help you maintain a firmer sense of self, but it also serves to keep you emotionally and mentally strong enough to give your children the best care possible. A clear head is a first and most important tool in raising happy and healthy kids.
If you spend every waking moment either looking after or worrying about your children, chances are you will quickly become exhausted and find the job of motherhood much more difficult. Make it easier by remembering to set aside time where you can read a book, watch a movie, or sit and enjoy your favorite snack uninterrupted by family concerns.
Focus on Your Dreams
Just because you have parental responsibilities doesn’t mean you no longer have a responsibility to yourself. If you have always dreamt of achieving a specific goal or moving somewhere exciting, try to work your family life into this dream. Compromise is critical when balancing motherhood and individuality, so tailor this advice to your needs. If, for example, you have always wished to one day become a nurse, take the first step, and apply to a Wilkes University nursing course.
If you would love to travel the world, plan segments of time where you can spend a week or two away from your children to visit distant countries. Of course, some dreams need to be delayed to fit around the priority of raising a family. This doesn’t mean they aren’t possible to achieve one day.
Nurture Your Relationship
If you are in a relationship while raising children, it can be challenging to see each other in a romantic light. Changing diapers and getting baby food on your shirt isn’t great for making you feel attractive. Of course, your children will be your priority, but make sure you don’t neglect your relationship.
Create opportunities for flirtation and date nights to remind each other of the first exciting days. Send cheeky text messages and treat one another like the desirable people you are.
Discover New Interests
Motherhood can truly change you as a person, which can feel like a loss of identity. If you are no longer interested in what used to entertain you or capture your imagination, try looking for new hobbies and activities. Just because becoming a mother might have diminished your passion for going to the movies, for example, doesn’t mean you can’t find something new to fill that space, such as swimming or woodwork or diving headfirst into a topic that interests you. Maybe your children will enjoy watching their mom have fun and, who knows, it could spark their passions.
Include Your Children
It can be tempting to hide your true self from your children because you want them to see you as the perfect mom. However, you are also a human being with feelings and ideas. Let your children see this side of you. It will help them develop empathy and grow into their personalities with greater ease.
Include them in your interests and teach them how to treat people with kindness even if they think or behave differently. You can start by letting them get to know you as both a mom and an individual.
Strengthen Your Body
Your body goes through many changes during pregnancy and motherhood, so it’s essential to do your best to keep it as fit and healthy as possible. Of course, don’t over-exert yourself, but figure out your limits and regularly motivate yourself to stretch them. Keeping your body fit will help keep your mind fit, which helps you raise your children successfully. It will also remind you that you are an autonomous human who deserves to care for yourself.
Don’t be Afraid to Ask for Help.
Being an individual doesn’t mean cutting yourself off from people when you need their help. Being a mom is hard work, and if you need assistance along the way, there is no shame in that. Therapists can help you find the perfect balance between taking great care of your children and your mental wellbeing. If a friend or family member offers their time to look after your kids to give you a chance to recuperate, don’t be insulted.
Be a Great Mom While Staying Individual
Sometimes you might have to ask for outside support from other people to meet your needs. Everyone is an individual, but none of us are alone.